Self Love, Self Healing

I often say to clients that healing begins with self-love. We then discuss how that is also one of the most challenging states to achieve. Self-hate, self-criticism, self-sabotage we can all manage admirably but self-love – can’t even get our heads around where to begin with that one.

When there has been an emotionally or physically absent parent (or two) the child blames itself. It says, “if only I was more lovable, if only I was better.” That message, which is a ‘faulty belief’ is so strong, so deeply accepted, that often as adults we can’t hear beyond it. If someone does compliment us or tell us we are lovable, we don’t trust their message – “They must just be saying that!” – “I know that isn’t true and one day they will find that out too.” So then we either choose to attract people who confirm our original belief, someone who puts us down, or we choose to work hard to hide the truth of ourselves from the person who amazingly loves us. Yet the truth at our centre is always the safest place, the authentic most loving place.

I prepare mantras for clients which offer positive statements to replace the negative, nagging narrative the mind prefers to run supporting the faulty belief of our flawed self. Some struggle even to read the words, never mind say them out loud, so strange is it to be telling yourself that you deserve to be loved, you deserve to be praised, you deserve to be nurtured. The next step down the track is to say regularly to yourself “I love you.” The next is to remove the concept of two separate entities and to merge identity into your greatest self with the statement, “I love me”. And the final step is the wonderful realization that at our core we all carry the essence of creation and the Creator – then we can state simply and with immeasurable strength “I AM LOVE!”